As these things often go, more has come to light. It was revealed to me that my wife had been flirting with other men for better part of a year before I knew . I stayed at home , watched the little man, and encouraged her to have a life outside the marriage. And a… Continue reading Betrayal, lies and deceit.
I am beginning to notice that I have a few old patterns of thought that are re-surfacing. Why bother? When doing things that are not instantly gratifying or challenging, I keep wondering about why I bother. Here I should remind myself, that if I don't try , there is only one future for me. I… Continue reading Old habits
My son asked me while chomping on some grapes at breakfast. I said, "What do you mean?" What he said broke my heart. He said, "Is that why mom went to live in the new house?" I was speechless. Things like this are a reminder that the little guy is trying to process the changes… Continue reading Is this a bad house?
When in december , my wife decided that our marriage was done, I was sent into free fall. Its hard to fathom that so much time has gone by. My resolve was to not let this period of trauma go to waste. Instead use the motivation to push myself forward. This month will have a… Continue reading A month of little adventures
I have not written in a while. Some of my new habits have kept me busy. And I also drove about 700 miles or so to Los Angeles and back this weekend, with my son in tow. It was a fantastic time for the little man. He played with his cousin. And we went to… Continue reading A weekend spent well.
This sunday, I trudged my a 2200 ft hill over a 7 mile hike. I had 55lbs on my shoulders, and it was positively grueling. My shoulders took the brunt of it. My legs were mostly ok. But when I was at the summit. I felt this sense of calm. I looked at the vista,… Continue reading Crawling towards the light.
Today is Saturday. And last week was not too bad at work. But I was a homebody mostly. My therapist had advised that I try to get morebin touch with my feelings. So I tried. I felt sad often, but I did not feel the powerful pull on my heart. I suppose I refuse myself… Continue reading Progress piecemeal
Something has derailed my positive mental attitude towards this recovery from heartbreak. I find myself feeling the same way I did about 2-3 weeks ago. Feeling hopeless and heartbroken. I miss my wife. Wondering if there is any light at the end of the tunnel. I am going to try and focus on winning today.… Continue reading Out of steam
Its a precious thing, the love between a man and woman. Two people investing their dreams in one another. Some people are lucky to find such a bond that lasts a lifetime. But, for me and my wife, this was not to be. How I loved her. And how I despised her at the same… Continue reading A love consumed