Failed to wake at 530 again. Too lazy. Did things a bit faster, today. And the little man cooperated much better.
Work was a little boring and slow, so left a tad bit earlier.the commute was an hour each way.
Bought a bottle of wine for my new neighbor, and got in ited for dinner. They seem nice.
I am still a bit irritable with life. But otherwise , taking care of him is not too bad.
Tomorrow, he goes and stays wih his mom. I have planned a open mic night. Planning to sing either an Eddie Veder cover, or perhaps an Oasis one.
So thursday night, I am out with a friend. And friday is open mic. Saturday is a hike planned. Sunday, I am not sure, hopefully do a mountain bike ride and dinner with some friends.
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Published by divorcehealingblog
The meaning of the “second chance” I seek has been changed a lot. I started writing this in the hope of saving my marriage. But as time showed me , that was futile and misguided. Now I seek a second chance to be father to my six year old boy. He will no longer live with me starting aug2018. I hope to use this blog to allow him an insight into his father. I would want him to read this when he is older.
My original synopsis
A man in crisis. I am a 30 -something man. My 10 year marriage shattering in front of my eyes. I have decided that writing helps. I am hoping to heal from whats coming, but before that I have to deal with it. Experience the pain, I know I will feel, when my wife walks out the door.
I have a little boy who I don't want to lose. And I am scared. Of restarting my life from scratch. I am hoping to find kindred spirits on the blog, who are going through or have gone through what I am experiencing.
But I have hope, and I have faith. To some degree, I hope to reconcile my marriage.
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Is keeping busy helping you? I still feel like I might not deserve to keep busy, like I deserve to hurt and I should focus on this hurt. I dont have the right to move on yet…. not until the one that I have hurt has moved on.
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It helps me a lot. Just the right amount of busy, I cant handle too much stress. I need to regain confidence in my social ability and in myself.
I would not want my wife to not move on, despite how I feel. She left because she was unable to deal with the negatives in our marriage. She was unhappy, and I always wanted happiness for her.
I dont do well focusing on the hurt. It makes me suicidal. So I focus on being happy 😄
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Ya suicidal is definitely not good….. I really appreciate you sharing your story. Just know that it is helping others….
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Good planning, don’t stress too much tho, Sunday is a day for relax only ;))
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